Editing and Revision: Polishing Your Manuscript

Ask the Authors (Round 2)

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We all want our writing to be the best that it can be. Our stories are our creations, our children, and as good parents and creators, we want them to be as close to perfect as possible. And so we toil over it endlessly, trying to find just the right words to make our stories shine and stand out.
Our Ask the Authors panel will be discussing just that this week, the editing process and why it’s necessary, and whether the expense of hiring a professional editor is worth the money. Our panel members this week include: Mark Shaw, RA Winter, Dan Alatorre, DeAnna Knippling, Jordan Elizabeth, Tom Johnson, Lilly Rayman, Amy Cecil, Cynthia Vespia and Margareth Stewart. Let’s find out how they handle the tasks of editing and revision.

I know by the time my book reaches the editing and revision stage, I’m often so tired of looking at it, that the thought of going over it once more, or even a few more times makes me say, “Ugh!” But, if I set the manuscript aside for a while and then try an tackle it again, in the end, I always come out with a better story than I would have had had I not taken the time to edit and revise.
How do you feel about the editing and revision process? Do you love it or loath it?
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) Not crazy about it but necessary. All writers are re-writers, that’s part of the job. With Denial of Justice, probably at least 300 drafts, at least.
RA Winter
RA Winter Hate editing and revisions but they always pay out in the end.  I usually have a vision and my process is very weird.  I write a piece that is long-winded, combine, cut, cut, smash, then keep the best parts. I overwrite my first draft knowing that it will need a heavy hand.
Dan Alatorre
Alatorre I used to hate it because it’s tedious and boring, but now I see it as a way to improve. I have pretty tight stories that move quickly, so there’s less trimming necessary, and I’ve learned to trust my partners. When they say I need to cut a scene or even a chapter, I hesitate but I cut it.
DeAnna Knippling
deannak It depends?  I often end up getting into discussions with my ghostwriting clients about the edits they request.  I try to champion the reader when I get edits back from an editor–will this benefit the reader? Or will it cause logical issues, plot holes, and strange jumps in emotion?  I don’t stress too much about the line edits I get; comma ci, comma ca.  Of course I dislike the edits that require massive changes, but sometimes they’re just necessary.
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan I love the opportunity to make the story better.  I always take into consideration what my critique partners and editors say.  Sometimes I feel a bit wounded at first, but I set the feedback aside, wait a day, and look again.  I’m better able to address the issues when I have a clear head.  The thing I loathe most about the process is changing something to fit an editor’s needs, and then having the editor want something different after the rewrite.  So long as its all good in the end, I’m happy.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture It’s a necessary evil. Believe me, left on my own I can make mistakes. And I never see them because I see what I think I wrote, not what is actually there. Editing and revision is a must in my opinion.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Meh! LOL. Depends on how much I enjoy the story and how much time I have spent on it. Some stories I just absolutely love, and don’t mind going over it again and again, improving it, making it better. Others I just want out of my hands ASAP. Lol.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil It really doesn’t bother me at all. My editor does the hard part.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy It’s a necessary evil but it’s not my favorite part of the process.


What roles do alpha readers, beta readers, critique partners, editors, or proofreaders play in your editing and revision process? 
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) Publisher provides editor and proofreader when book reaches that stage.
RA Winter
RA Winter I do each step above.  Alpha readers are key for me.  I have a tendency to let my humor take over and sometimes (read often) it’s just too much.  Alpha readers pull me back and give me a ‘what’s working and geez, RA, cut the humor’.  Critique partners are my first line of attack.  They concentrate on each chapter and give reader reaction, plot development, and interest.  Moving forward, next is the beta readers. Sometimes, if a beta read doesn’t give me the required feedback that I want, I’ll submit my piece for re-crits of certain chapters.  I have an editor/proofreader that I found and you can’t have her, well, you can, but I love my editor. She’s the best at catching every little grammar mistake but allowing me to keep my voice.  I rely on my editor and take her advice in all things.
Dan Alatorre

Alatorre Huge, each of them. My process is: I create an outline then write chapters and send them to my critique partners, getting daily feedback while I continue to write the rest of the story. Then I incorporate their suggestions, then send that revised MS to another CP who acts as editor. Then after any additional changes, the MS goes to betas, typos and other minor errors get fixed, and then it gets released.

alpha readers – my critique partners are pretty much my alpha readers and editors, as explained below

beta readers – this step is huge. My stories get read by a group of betas (post CPs and post editing) to see if the story is tight and to spot typos or errors. Each will see something the others didn’t, too. I love my betas.

critique partners – I used to be in a free online critique group, which I joined because I was told helping others would sharpen my own skills. It worked. After a few years, I quit that group and started my own (on a pay basis), and I began editing for others for a fee, but I still have a few key people from those days that I rely heavily on. They are basically my sole CPs and editor(s) now.

editors – I reciprocate editing with two other bestselling authors, so we hold each other to high standards. Using them is what makes my stories so good.

proofreaders – I use my beta readers as proofreaders. It’s like crowdsourcing, and they are good at it.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak When I first started out, I tended toward asking everyone’s opinion and trying to take what they said as gospel.  I also spent a lot of time explaining to everyone why their opinions were wrong!  Hah!  I’ve seen that with a lot of newer writers, too, so I guess it’s just part of the process.  Now I tend more toward getting fewer opinions–a good editor is worth their weight in gold, obviously, but a bad editor can drain your will to live.

 

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan After finishing a novel, I send it to my critique partners.  Once I’ve addressed their comments, I send it to my publisher.  My publisher then sends the book through an editor for 2 edits, and then a final proofreader.  I hate it when a typo or two still slip through!

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Now that I am self-publishing, my manuscripts are gone over by my wife. She goes over my manuscript before it goes anywhere, and she is good about catching wrong words, misspellings, and bad grammar.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I have a critique partner who helps me with my second edit stage, and editor on hand that I ask for all those pesky little grammar rules and to make sure I get things right, and then I slip through my own manuscript and apply them. My shorter stories that I write for anthologies I send to my editor, and I use the feedback on my editorial mistakes and learn from them, doing my best to avoid them in my larger manuscripts.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil Once I’m finished writing I send my manuscript to my beta readers before anybody else. They provide me with their suggested changes and most of the time I go with their suggestions. Once that is done, then it is off to the editor for two rounds of editing.  Once the editing process is done then it goes to my arc readers. And then it’s published.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I generally use a professional editor for grammar, mechanics, and to ensure the story flows.


Editing can be expensive and many authors today cannot afford to hire an editor. Some authors do their own editing to cut corners, although that can be a little like a doctor treating himself or a lawyer representing herself in court – we become blind to our own words and see them we intended them to be, overlooking many errors. Another set of eyes can be critical. Some authors join critique groups or writing groups and find their beta readers there. And traditionally and small press published authors likely have editors provided for them by their publisher.
How do you handle editing? Do you hire someone? Trade off with someone? DIY? Have a publisher who handles it?
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) A writer should never do a final edit before publication; money well spent to hire someone to take an objective look.
Dan Alatorre

Alatorre I use a combination. If I let my MS rest, I can catch a lot of mistakes. Between the CPs, the betas, and a final edit (I trade editing with two other bestselling authors), my MS is good to go. I do this for these reasons: 1. editing is expensive, but most stories need better pace more than they need commas in the right place, and few editors do as good a job at pace than I do/my CPs do;  2. Money spent on editing – often $750 – $1500 – would be better spent on marketing; and 3. My team does a good job, but I’ve read plenty of professionally edited manuscripts that (A) have errors and (B) don’t have errors but the story is boring because the pace sucks.

Write a gripping, fast-paced story with interesting characters readers care about, and you can have missing commas. Most editors fix the commas but most writers need the story fixed. MS Word will alert you to a lot of mistakes if you let it, and there is a lot of free online software you can use if you are worried about passive tense nonsense. If you use an editor, deliver them as clean a MS as you can by using the steps I’ve discussed first. It’ll save you money.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak I’ve done pretty much every option at some point or other.  My current preference is for advanced readers and a proofreader for novel-length work.  Short stories tend to get a little more fast and loose due to deadlines.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan My publishers all handle the editing process.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Before I started self-publishing my books, publishers supplied editors to go over my manuscripts. Now I do it myself, but with my wife’s help.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman As a self-published author on the smell of an oily rag budget a 130K word manuscript can be very pricey to have edited. My critique partner is a wonderful help in the editing and proofing of the monster sized stories, and I use my editorial feedback from my shorter, professionally edited ones to try and avoid my errors. Like I said, I see them as learning experiences and use them to improve. But I ALWAYS have another set of eyes go across my manuscripts to check for final proofing before I hit publish.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil I hire someone to do my editing, I don’t trust myself, and I think other authors are way too critical and read more into content and they do actual editing. Although my editor helps me with content he is less biased than another author would be.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I’ve worked with in-house editors at the publishing house; I’ve done it myself; and I’ve hired a freelancer. Of the 3 I preferred the in-house editor. I believe it was because she was on a retainer so she gave my work more attention than the freelancer who seemed to rush through it. I’m not saying all freelance editors are that way but you get what you pay for indeed. As for doing it yourself, I have done that to cut corners and it always comes back to bite me. Inevitably a reader will find a mistake.

Margareth Stewart 

Margareth Stewart I do everything. First, I edit it on myself. Then, I apply some online media resources, like “Prowritingaid” for instance. When I can´t find any mistakes, but I know they are there, I send it to a professional editor for line editing and proofreading. While doing this, I test some excerpts of the book in writing groups so I can receive feed-back on plot, voice, and narrative. When I get it back, I start my submissions to publishers. When it is accepted by a publisher, it will be edited again. On top of all that, I have no mercy while editing, I cut and cut repeatedly until it is the core essential words within the book. My motto is “if there is an idea that has been said in a hundred words that can be said in ten; use ten.” I am very satisfied with it, I may not have a long book, but I have everything that is needed for an enjoyable reading!

Have you ever received edits which you felt showed that the editor didn’t get what you were doing at all? 
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) The Reporter Who Knew Too Much became a bestseller but the editor who first looked at it said it was disjointed, too much repetition, didn’t make sense in places, nasty, nasty. Publisher let me ignore those comments and published the book I wanted to write.
Dan Alatorre
Alatorre Nope. If I did, I wouldn’t worry about it. My stories are strong, and they aren’t meant for everyone.
DeAnna Knippling
deannak Yes, lots, but mostly from ghostwriting clients who want a certain type of book but didn’t explain that ahead of time, or who don’t know the genre all that well but think that it’ll turn a profit.  And some clients are frustrated that you didn’t write the book exactly as they envisioned.  But mostly edits that I receive from clients are very good.
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan It did happen once, and I brought it up with the publisher.  They assigned me to a different editor and we clicked instantly.  She understood the story and had a keen eye for details.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Yes, I write in the old style, the way authors wrote for the pulp magazines, and more was allowed back then. Adjectives, adverbs, verbs, and colorful phrases. Editors want to eliminate a lot of extra words, but writing for the pulps paid a cent a word, and authors had to get as many words in as they could to make enough for a good paycheck. That’s not how we’re paid today, for the most part. Although I recently submitted a story that pays three cents a word, we don’t really need all the extra words. But I’m writing stories that would have fit in the pulp magazines of the 1930s & ‘40s, and I want my stories to have the same sound. Editors can’t understand that.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I’ve had edits from an editor for an anthology that showed that they didn’t know what they were doing. Some people ‘think’ they know, but really they don’t. I think it’s important to get a sample edit done from an editor to see their work before you hire someone. My first book, I had three different sample edits done and quotes for the editing – one guy almost completely re-wrote my sample with all of his editing and totally missed the point entirely suggesting name changes to make characters easier for the reader to remember – I don’t think he grasped if I changed the names of my Egyptian gods, they wouldn’t be recognised as my Egyptian gods.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy Yes. I had an editor work on two different manuscripts and on the first one it was a more in-depth edit. When it came to the second manuscript they seemed to have hurried through it. I wasn’t happy with that at all.


Have you ever received edits that made you think the editor was totally off, only to find as you began to work through them, that they were actually spot on?

Dan Alatorre

Alatorre Sort of. My very first editor was trying to help me but I was too defensive about the story. I learned to not be defensive, and things got a lot better.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak Isn’t that how edits just go?  Like, when you first receive your edits, you go, “CAN’T THEY SEE THE VISION IN MY HEAD?!?”  No matter how good the edits are, your first reaction is to reject them!  Good editors still elicit this reaction from me; I just don’t say anything about it until later, when we can both look back and laugh.
I’d like to add a note:
I also do edits, so I’ve been on both sides of the table.  Most of the time, authors are very accommodating about edits, especially when it’s a question of getting their name in print!  But there’s something I’d like to note:  a lot of time when I’m working with an intermediate writer on a developmental level, I’ll have to stop and…unfix what a previous editor or critique group has broken.  I think a lot of writers have an almost pathological fear that their writing isn’t good enough, so they edit it to death, and let other people’s comments control what they choose to do with their work.  One of the reasons that I’ve pulled back from getting so much feedback (as a writer) is that I’ve seen too many clients (as an editor) who have brutalized their fiction in the name of achieving “perfection” at the cost of “good enough.”  A lot of the time, I’ll go, “You let a bunch of people comment on this, and I can tell; please send me a previous draft.”  If the previous draft ends up being better, which it often does, then I’ll have them work from that.
Here’s what constitutes “good enough”:
  • The reader can understand what’s going on.
  • The reader forms clear opinions about the characters.
  • The reader had a clear feeling about the ending.
The rest is all gravy, and of course you have to make sure your test readers actually like the kind of thing that you write before taking their opinions into account.  Another thing to remember is that an editor is essentially a super-qualified reader.  Your editor has to love the kind of thing that you write and in particular want to stand up as an advocate for your story in a positive way, or it’s going to be a train wreck!  You need a champion, not a book reviewer 🙂
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan It has happened a time or two.  Many of my stories, like GOAT CHILDREN, are personal, based off real events, and to have an editor say something is unrealistic (even though it really happened) or to change around major points can be tough to hear.  I did utilize all of the feedback, waited a few weeks, and reread the story.  Changing those points did make it stronger, and the story wasn’t a memoir so it didn’t feel too dishonest.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture That’s hard to say. Yes, the editor is qualified to make those changes in the modern style, but are they destroying what I am doing by making me follow modern writing, instead an eighty-year-old style I’m trying to imitate? There’s no easy answer here.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman My favourite editor, the one who puts up with me asking for clarification of grammar rules. At first I was confused with some of her suggestions, and then when I queried her on them – yes, you can challenge your editor and ask them to clarify – and she explained WHY something was as it was, I nodded my head, filed the information away and worked to keep that new lesson learned first and forefront in my mind as I move forward with my new works.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil No, my editors help me think outside the box at times and two right in areas that are far out of my comfort zone.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy For the most part the editors I’ve worked with did have some good feedback. But its the readers who have given me the most food for thought. For instance, my last book Karma has some well developed antagonists that seemed to take over the story. It told me 2 things. (1) I need to punch up my hero characters and (2) The antagonist needs a story of their own!


What I take away from all this is that having a publisher to take care of tasks such as editing, so the author doesn’t have to worry about it is great, although it doesn’t offer much choice as to who you work with, and then your faced with deciding if their suggestions hit the mark or not. For independently published authors, it seems that if you can afford an editor, it’s probably well worth the money, but on a tight budget just being sure that more than your own eyes comb the manuscript, whether in the form of critique partners, alpha or beta readers, or exchanging edits with your fellow authors. (No, your mother/spouse/children do not count. We’re talking about a trained set of eyes, not someone who is expected to say they love it whether they do or not.) Just be sure that whoever reads and comments on your manuscript, they are a good fit for your work. And remember an addage my M.F.A. instructor, Russell Davis, pounded into his students heads. “Don’t take it personal. Their criticism is not about you, it’s all about the work.”

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“Operation Hail Storm”: A pleasant surprise

Operation Hail Storm

From the cover, I thought Operation Hail Storm, by Brett Arquette was going to be a military action tale, but I was a little surpised because it’s not. It’s more of a spy thriller with a touch of romance worked in.  It’s got spies and lots of action and the coolest drones.

Marshall Hail is in the business of nuclear energy and stealth operations using high tech drones in this futuristic thriller. As a wealthy enterprenuar, Marshal Hail has found a way to offer cheap nuclear energy to underprivaleged countries, and it has made him even richer. He chooses to use those riches to build his own team of operatives and take out the worst of the world’s worst, but the U.S.A. is unsure if he’s a good guy hero or a bad boy vigilante and they send one of their top operatives, Kara Ramey, to gather intelligence and help them decide. But their is something in the air between Hail and Ramey that’s ensures a gradually budding romance is on the horizon whether either of them is willing to admit it.

This tale is repetitive in places,  has headhopping omnipotence, and the snappy banter of many action novels which I  dislike if it’s not done well.  In spite of all that, it is a good story that kept the pages turning, and that’s what counts. I give Operation Hail Storm three quills.

three-quills3

Kaye Lynne Booth does honest book reviews on Writing to be Read in exchange for ARCs. Have a book you’d like reviewed? Contact Kaye at kayebooth(at)yahoo(dot)com.


Action Scenes: Keeping the Story Moving

Ask the Authors (Round 2)

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This week the Ask the Authors panel is discussing writing action scenes and pacing the story. We’ve got a great group of authors on the author panel and I want to thank them all for going the extra mile and getting their answers to me on a very short deadline. Our author panel this week consists of Tom Johnson, DeAnna Knippling, Mark Shaw, Cynthia Vespia, Lilly Rayman, RA Winter, Ashley Fontainne, and Jordan Elizabeth. 

A story where nothing happens isn’t much of a story. Action is what makes the story and each individual scene move forward. But, pacing also has a lot to do with it, and if an action scene moves too fast, we take a chance of losing the readers, and if it moves too slow, we may put them to sleep. Our ultimate goal is to allow readers to follow the story and want to read more, so let’s see how our panel members go about doing that.

What tips do you have for writing fight scenes, or car chases, where a blow by blow description might get boring?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture My fight scenes and car chases tend to be quicker than most. I’ve read books where a fight scene or car chase will play out over six or more pages. Real fight scenes and car chases don’t normally run that long in reality. Something will usually happen to bring both to an end. It looks good on movie screens, but it doesn’t happen that way, believe me. And I want my scenes to be quick.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak The more structured you can make an action scene, the better, I think.  This doesn’t mean you have to plan everything out beforehand, but that you stick to a pattern of beginnings, middles with separate beats, and endings fairly strictly.
–The beginning of any action scene should establish the location that the action will occur in.  I’ve been studying some film techniques on this, literally if you look up “establishing shot,” you’ll get a lot of useful information on how to do this.
–The middle should have beats, in which one character tries to do something new, and then we see the results of the same.  Each action the character takes should be opposed by something–and that thing should be different every time.  In a fight scene, for example, one character might try hitting the other, who dodges.  Then the character tries to hit the other again, and they run away.  And so on.  No action by any fighter should be an unqualified success, although you can certainly kill off some characters who aren’t too important.  No major character should completely succeed or fail until the end of the action scene–any success or failure will likely be followed by some twist before the end of the scene.
–The end of any big chunk of action scene should tell us what’s happening next, for example, the characters are leaving a warehouse and running out along a narrow sidewalk near a canal, and we see the characters each leaving the warehouse and going out onto the sidewalk.  Usually this happens when you move the characters from one place to another.  You want to make absolutely sure the reader can follow the physical layout of the action.
–The end of any action scene should wrap up the results of the action and how the character feels about it.
I’ve found that breakdowns of action scenes in films are pretty helpful here.  Here’s an example:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUu8u5PcK3s
Cynthia Vespia
colorheadshot - Copy Fight scenes! Now we’re talking!! I actually ran a hands-on workshop to teach exactly that. The tips I always give are to act out the motions yourself. Whether that means blocking it out like a choreographer does for a movie fight or using action figures to give yourself a sense of placement, do whatever strikes all your sensory details.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Oh, this is a tough question! I visualise the scene and I try to give an impression of the fight where the finer details are not necessary. Here is an example from a work in progress of the fight being witnessed by another character within the room.

Horus recovered from being thrown across the room before he hit the tiled floor and was in a fighter’s stance as soon as Seth was on his feet. Hathor watched the pair as they silently stalked each other in a circle. Seth was unarmed, but a far superior warrior than his much younger nephew. It was of little surprise to Hathor that Seth was the first to move in and engage Horus. He darted inside of Horus’ reach, knocking the blade from his hand before grappling with him.

The wash of testosterone and anger pheromones filled the chamber, making Hathor dizzy with the fight against her vampiric nature. She had always been more controlled than the rest of her brethren, yet at this moment, she found herself wanting to sink her teeth into Seth and drain him of his life force. In an attempt to anchor herself, her fingers dug so deeply into the column that hid her from few that she felt the stone crumble under her fingers.

Horus and Seth were still grappling with each other, using their knees and feet to try and strike a blow on their opponent whilst trying to be the one to throw the other to the ground. Both had something to gain by winning this fight, and everything to lose if they didn’t.

Horus was the first to break through his uncle’s balance and the pair crashed to the floor, the sound of their half-naked bodies slapping against the tiles overly loud in Hathor’s ears. Seth was swift to roll the pair over until he was towering above his nephew. His knees pinned against Horus’ elbows, knocking Horus’ hold against Seth away. Seth locked his ankles in tight against the younger man’s body, sitting down on his stomach and using his greater weight to help pin Horus to the floor.

Ashley Fontainne
Ashley Fontainne I find the best way is to give simultaneous descriptions from the viewpoint of several characters involved in the scene.
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan I try to keep my sentences short.  Heavy paragraphs weigh down the action and can take away from the impact of a fight scene.

Scenes with a lot of action are exciting and fun and can keep the story moving, but if there is a lot going on, it’s important that we don’t lose the reader in the mayhem, causing them to drift away.

How do you write action sequences clearly, so as not to confuse readers when there is a lot going on, like on a battle field or a chase scene? Any secrets?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture In a battlefield you want to concentrate on a person, what they are doing while the action takes place around them. Ever notice in the movies when a soldier is killed, the action and sounds around him cease as his buddies bend over him. No more explosions, gunfire, loud noise until the scene is over, then boom! Here comes all the noise again. They want the audience to feel his buddy’s sadness for his death. We need to do the same thing. Slow the action, stop the noise, play the scene out, then go back to the battle.

I’ve been in real battles, and here’s what really angers me about combat scenes in fiction. The sergeant and his men are in a firefight with the enemy, and the sergeant is thinking about his girlfriend and the sex he had last night. Let me tell you, when you are in a firefight, you’re not thinking about sex or girlfriends, you’re only wanting to concentrate your fire on the enemy. Forget sex. Forget everything else. Concentrate on the enemy.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak Once you have everything set up and you’re in the actual beats of action, only have two characters fighting or one character vs. one other assorted danger at a time.  Even when it would be reasonable for two conflicts to be going on at one time, just show one conflict at a time.  One character can fight off a group of attackers, but those attackers have to strike separately and be dealt with separately, or they have to strike in unison, and be dealt with in unison.  People’s ability to deal with real-life emergencies and fights is just proverbially bad.  You have to break things up artificially in units–very short units, so the reader isn’t aware that you’re feeding them information very, very carefully.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy You focus on your viewpoint character. There may be a huge battle, with alot going on around your character, but whoever’s story is being told at that point in the story you write what they see. Then, if you need to get information across about a specific incident happening in the fight elsewhere, simply cut to another character. But if we go back to writing about POV make sure you’re giving them their own chapter breaks, or emphasize that there’s a new character focus within the same chapter rather than bouncing from head-to-head. This keeps the action clear for the reader.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman It’s much the same as when writing a multiple character conversation, where you ensure that rather than dialogue tags that identify the actioner of the fight, you still use some sort of identifiable information. As the author you need to be clear in your own mind who is doing what, and then relay that same information to the reader. Of course, you want to be careful to avoid too much repetition of the character names, and try and use other monikers, as in my last answers example:

Seth was swift to roll the pair over until he was towering above his nephew. His knees pinned against Horus’ elbows, knocking Horus’ hold against Seth away. Seth locked his ankles in tight against the younger man’s body, sitting down on his stomach and using his greater weight to help pin Horus to the floor.

Ashley Fontainne

Ashley Fontainne Secrets? No. Once the scene is written I go back and review numerous times and read out loud, making sure the flow makes sense and is easy to follow.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I keep action scenes short.  To keep up the impact of the action, you don’t want to bog it down or make it go on for too many pages.


Show, don’t tell. I’ve heard that from the time I first started writing. More than likely we all have. It’s pretty common writing advice, and it really is important advice to heed. When a story tells the reader what happens, rather than showing, I call it the omnipotent reader voice, where the narrator sees all and knows all, and proceeds to tell us about it. While there are places where this voice can work and even be the best way to tell the story, in most cases, it’s much better to place the reader in the middle of the action and let the story unfold.

What tricks do you use to ensure you do more showing than telling?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Sadly, good writers often forget to show instead of telling. One author left the bad guy to be killed off stage. We read through the whole story, then the bad guy escapes to France and the story basically comes to an end. But the hero gets word that the bad guy was killed in his hotel room by a bellhop with a knife. No fare. That should have been a main scene in the book where the bad guy gets killed. Why the author did it this way I’ll never know. But we, as authors, must realize that important scenes can’t be left to be heard and not seen. I don’t use tricks I just keep my characters in action. They’re not going to leave an important unfinished.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak Make sure any backstory essential to the scene is handled before the scene.  Do the overall description of the setting at the beginning of the scene.   Then put any telling that’s not setting description in dialogue, and make the person saying use their words as an attack.  “I slept with your girlfriend!” is both telling rather than showing, and a verbal attack.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy Focus on the five senses. He tasted blood. Her ears rang from the strike. Etc.

RA Winter

RA Winter I like to add in my descriptions in an active way.  I use each of the five senses to define the scene and go into a deeper point of view while using the tone of the story to drive the showing.  Does that make sense? Also, I use a lot of descriptions in odd ways, like this (pre-edit) passage from Twisted.

The air burst into a kaleidoscope of colored shards that twinkled. Whirling into a mini tornado, pieces broke off and a puzzle began. Steely white skin, firm breasts, long dark hair, piercing blue eyes, luscious red lips…

Everyone knows what a tornado and a puzzle look like and hopefully, you can imagine the scene.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman This example gives the reader a more in-depth sensation of the fight, than just being told. I’m trying to invoke the sounds of the fight with the reader and not just dictating the movements.

Horus was the first to break through his uncle’s balance and the pair crashed to the floor, the sound of their half-naked bodies slapping against the tiles overly loud in Hathor’s ears.

Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan I try to include a lot of sounds and smells.  Adding in extra senses helps to show what’s going on without telling.

Of course we want exciting action scenes, but we need to keep it real. If you mess up a fight scene by saying a blow caused an injury which in life never would happen, there’s a martial arts expert somewhere who will read your story and call you on it. If you say a driver flipped a car end over end, landed it on it’s wheels and took off, readers will start dropping off because that wouldn’t really happen. We are told to write what we know for this reason, but nobody knows everything and there will be times when we have to write about experiences that we don’t have first hand knowledge of.

Have you ever taken lessons or sought out experts to learn how a fight might play out, or how a particular weapon operates, or perhaps how a person would react to a particular poison? Anything like that? If so, why was it necessary and do you feel your writing benefitted from it?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Actually, I was involved in Judo and Karate for six years, and studied come-along holds. Plus, as a cop I was involved in many car chases, so I knew what I was doing, and even though I quit practicing judo and karate, I was pretty well trained, and remember the moves even today, so my fight scenes come from my studies, and car chases from my experience.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak I took karate lessons with my daughter when she was younger, have taken a class on guns (in which I was able to fire lots of different types), and have done research on poisons and a ton of other things.  I’ve been getting into studying strategic thinking too, so I can write some battle scenes.  I don’t know if it’s necessary, but it’s fun.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy As I mentioned, I ran a workshop myself that taught writers how to make fight scenes more believable. I’m a certified personal trainer and I’ve practiced different forms of martial arts so I know how the body moves very well. My workshop is a hands-on because it allows those attending the benefit of feeling what a strike is like. By that I mean I use focus mitts and gloves and I absorb the hit. To be clear, No one is ever struck in class. Its just an exercise in movement.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Google is every authors best friend to identify whether a certain injury would make blood trickle from the mouth or not.

My husband is a great source of knowledge on firearms and how to use a weapon safely and the sounds that you would expect to hear when you load the gun for example.

I also have some personal experience in practicing a martial art, and use that knowledge to help me when I am writing a fighting sequence using that martial art. I also still have contact with my old Sensei and I have him review my scenes to make sure that I have worded my sequence correctly.

Ashley Fontainne

Ashley Fontainne I contacted a herpetological society to discuss a venomous snake and how the poison reacts inside the human body to glean correct information. I also conferred several times with a forensic DNA specialist to understand the process of testing and proper vernacular.

Margareth Stewart 

Margareth Stewart Yes, by all means! I need all kinds of information to get the correct showing of the story. So I use immersion into the character world. To do that, I use “Google” research, ethnology, interviews, visiting the place if possible, looking at photos, and I read diaries, too; so I can understand that context through multiple perspective. Then, I write. But, I only write when all that date has been immersed inside me, so it becomes part of me and the character can easily have access to that to make everything real, and it is real. This is how it works for me, and even after the book is over, everything seems real. This happens with my novel Open/Pierre´s journey after war, available at web-e-books.com, a novel about WWII. When I came to visit the WW2 Museum in New Orleans and I read all the real stories of men who had fought into war, I realized Pierre´s story was not fictional, it was real, I had captured the whole essence of it, and it is all there in the book.


Plots must move forward, but different stories move at different paces. The pacing in the story can set the tone, and keep the pages moving, but a story that moves too fast may leave the reader behind, or worse yet lost. A story that moves too slow loses readers to sleep or boredom. But not all stories are paced the same, nor should they be. Dialogue is one tool which can be used to slow things down, by breaking up fast paced action and allowing readers to catch their breath, or speed things up by informing readers of information needed before the story can move forward.

In what ways do you use dialogue to affect the pacing of the story?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Use the dialog to help pace the story. You can’t have all dialog, or all description, or all action, you have to let each move the story to the next level. In my story, Carnival of Death there is a big fight scene towards the end of the story, where the two opponents face off before a fight to the death, and they do this is dialog. They don’t just go into the fight, they move into the fight through dialog. The deadly fight will be fast, and only one will survive. One boasts while the other watches with her eyes as they talk. It’s a good fight scene.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak I often use action to break up dialog.  (My characters can get talky.)  But in a fight scene, I’ll use dialog to break up action.  Anything to break up a continuous pattern helps the reader’s brain go, “Ah!  I know what’s going on.”

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I don’t tend to use a lot of dialog. Let’s face it, unless you’re trash talking someone like a WWE superstar you’re not going to be doing alot of jaw-jacking during a fight in real life.

RA Winter

RA Winter Dialog is a great tool to move things along or slow things down depending on what’s going to happen next.  I like to keep dialog on every page.  Too much prose may be pretty, but it slows the reader down and might bog down your writing creating a saggy part.   I also love to write the interactions between to warring MC’s.  It brings out the humor in my writing.

Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) Even with non-fiction, using dialogue can be quite valuable especially since conversations between the biographical subject and those that knew her or him really can move the story along, keep the pacing with the story you are trying to tell. This has been especially helpful in both The Reporter Who Knew Too Much about Dorothy Kilgallen and the upcoming Denial of Justice to be released Nov. 20. Using primary sources to reflect what Dorothy said provides credibility, the dialogue important to bring her story alive.

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Sometimes it’s needed to slow down an action scene, maybe a break in a fight to allow the reader to catch their breath by having the fighters stop, wipe away blood, throw a couple of taunts at each other before they launch back in against each other.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan Dialogue can help break up thick paragraphs of text.  Sometimes I have my characters talk about what’s going on so that I don’t have to tell it to the reader.  It flows better coming from a character.

Margareth Stewart

 Margareth Stewart I tend to use lots of dialogues within my stories and I do believe they are very useful tools not only to give voice to characters but also to place rhythm and dynamics into it. They increase the story’s pace and move it forward in a more three-dimensional way. I also find dialogues much more amusing than description and I have been focusing on them lately in my story. Sometimes, there is so much that can be said in a simple sentence. These are one of my favorite ones from Mademoiselle-Sur-Seine which will be published soon.

“Mind if I smoke?”

“No, not really.”

“Would you like one?”

“Oh, no sorry, I do not smoke, thanks.”

Louise did not really mind. It was just a cigarette and that would not make any difference. Louise was wrong.”

Excerpt from Mademoiselle-Sur-Seine.


What other methods do you use to control and /or maintain your pacing?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture You have to make sure your readers know there is a story here. I give any book fifty pages, and if it hasn’t caught my attention by then it goes in the trash. So don’t drag the story. Keep it moving while you are introducing your characters. Please. No sex on the first page. That’s not the kind of action I’m looking for. I want to know your characters. No, I want to be one of your characters. Make them interesting, and make me want to be like one of them. You don’t need to kill someone on the first page, either. There are many ways to create action to introduce your characters. Remember The New Avengers on TV? When we are introduced to Mike Gambit he is on the judo mat with an opponent, and we see him in action. Emma Peel was always in action even if she was powdering her face. These were characters born for action. That’s what we want readers to think about our characters. Don’t blink, something is going to happen if you do.

DeAnna Knippling

deannak That’s a whole discussion on its own.  I did a whole blog series on pacing, which you can find here.  To sum up:  Pacing is how you make the reader feel the way the characters are feeling.  A laborious sentence feels laborious; it feels like a lot of work to read. Making the sentences, paragraphs, words, scenes, etc., feel the same way the character feels makes them seem alive to the reader.
Handling the information in a story is somewhat separate from pacing; in general, put the explainey bits at the beginning of a scene, and only the explainey bits that you need to understand that one scene.  Beginnings of scenes are usually slower, so you don’t need to worry about the explainey bits dragging too much.  As long as the explainey bits are given in the character’s opinion, then they’ll be fun to read.  Stephen King is great at handling information setup; check out the beginning of any of his novels and you’ll see that he tends to dedicate a lot of words to explaining what’s going on before he writes any kind of action, no matter how tame.  He has a few stories that are exceptions (he’ll still have a few hundred words of setup before things get started, but not entire chapters), but he also makes sure the reader doesn’t actually need to know much before the action begins.
Cynthia Vespia
colorheadshot - Copy This is a technique I actually teach in my workshop. It has to do with using very short, impactful sentences rather than long strings of description.
RA Winter
RA Winter There are a few key pieces to every plot. I mix together a romantic plot with fantasy or magical realism undertones then line them up on Scrivner.  Each section needs a purpose, clarity and a tad of fluffing. Keep on plot, don’t drag it out endlessly.  A good dilemma or a scene, sequel plot sequence helps too.  And most importantly, listen to alpha or beta readers.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Oh, another curly question! You avoid the slowest paces by avoiding too many unnecessary details – such as the fact the reader doesn’t really need to know the ins and outs of the main characters showering habits. You only need to include the shower if there is anything going to happen whilst the character is in the shower – such as an intruder will attack them with a knife, or maybe a love interest slips in and initiates an intimate scene.

You also try and keep your pace moving along swiftly where it needs to, a car chase should be over in a matter of paragraphs, cars move at speed after all, you really don’t need to drag a fast-paced action out with heaps of unnecessary descriptors or needless conversation.

You want a page turner that keeps the reader engaged, but with enough of a pause between action sequences, that the readers can get their breath. Visualise the slower moments between the fast paces like a full stop at the end of the sentence.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I keep the action scenes fast and like to add in moments of self-reflection.  Those moments help to slow the pace down and give the reader a break.

Margareth Stewart

Margareth Stewart Pacing is the timing of the narrative. This time is directly related to the emotions, plot, POV of the story. Pacing is the watch of the story. If the story is about a fugitive who has 24-hour to hide—this needs one kind of pacing. If it is related to the reminiscences of memory, it may go into a more descriptive tone and read longer. As Einstein once said time is relative, and so is the pacing in the stories we read. If the story is good, and the pace is correct – reading time flies; otherwise, it may sound boring. To keep the right track, every single detail needs to match perfectly. Time is the thread that sews the story; and pacing is how fast or slow the sewer goes. There is no right or wrong in having slow narratives and faster ones. I also use flashbacks, foreshadows and withholding the suspense – to keep the story intriguing. Besides, I love working with various narratives in different time zones (for instance: one in the past and another one in the present), and intertwine them.


Every story has action, and it’s up to us to find the right pace for the idividual tale. No matter what methods we use to move the story along, the ultimate goal is to keep readers’ eyes glued to the page, or their fannies on the edges of their seats.  Dialogue can be used to break up the action and help control the pacing. Other tools might be short, quick sentences, or using a slower set up and then jumping into the action so things can move along at a faster pace, foreshadowing and/or flashbacks .

Action should be written with identifying traits or characteristics that make it clear who is doing what, may be intentionally paced faster, and they must be accurate and believable. Just as dialogue can be used to break up the action, action can be used to break up dialog and speed things up.

I want to again thank our author panel for the timely replies and for their willingness to share with us here today. I hope you will all join us next Monday, when our panel members will discuss the editing and revision process on Ask the Authors.


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“How I Sold 80,000 Books”: Advice Every Author Should Know

How I Sold 80,000 Books

How I Sold 80,000 Books: Book Marketing for Authors (Self Publishing Through Amazon and Other Retailers), by Alinka Rutkowska offers authors valuable marketing tips coming from the business end of writing. Coming from a marketing background, Rutkowska shares tips on the art of successful book marketing, which might be applied to increase book sales and push the author’s name up on the bestseller’s listings.

Although the advice in How I Sold 80,000 Books is aimed mostly toward nonfiction works, Rutkowska claims it can easily be applied to works of fiction, too. The book takes readers through the author’s step-by-step marketing system, which she uses to sell her own books. She shares her secrets for producing a quality product that sells, talks about the best outlets through which to offer your books, discusses how to put the best price on your books, and effective ways to promote your books. Although every step may not be applicable by every author, they are all good, solid book marketing advice.

The valuable book marketing advice contained within may be why this book was a Readers’ Favorite Book Award winner, and why every author should add How I Sold 80,000 Books to their must read list. I will use much of the advice received from this book and I give it five quills.

five-quills3

Kaye Lynne Booth does honest book reviews on Writing to be Read in exchange for ARCs. Have a book you’d like reviewed? Contact Kaye at kayebooth(at)yahoo(dot)com.


Halloween: Scary, but Fun

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People love to be scared, especially within a safe environment. That’s why the horror genre will always be popular. Sitting around trying to scare one another by telling ghost stories or urban legends is a passtime enjoyed and induldged by young and old alike. It’s one of the reasons Hallowen is a favorite holiday for many, with haunted houses and ghost stories and a monster around every corner.

But telling ghost stories to pass the time on a stormy night isn’t any type of new passtime. In fact, two hundred years ago, on a damp and dreary night, Mary Shelly’s Frankenstien was created on just such an occassion, when a challenge was issued to see who could invent the best scary story.  Today’s monsters may be digitally enhanced, but we still enjoy sharing their stories, searching for an inkling of fear or a rush of adrenaline to get our hearts pumping.

Dead Man's Party

That’s why I hope you’ll all drop in and join in the fun at the Sonoran Dawn’s Dead Man’s Party today on Facebook, where myself and other authors will be reading scary stories, playing games and holding giveaways. Many of the authors from the Dark Visions anthology, which I reviewed this past month, including Writng to be Read team member Jordan Elizabeth, and AtA panel member, Dan Alatorre, who compiled and produced the anthology which climbed up the ratings for best horror anthology rapidly following its release. I gave the anthology five quills and it is well worth the read. I’m excited to be reading a few of their stories for them, as well as my own The Haunting of Carrol’s Woods, and can’t wait to hear the audio recordings of the other’s stories, too.  I hope you will join us. It may be scary, but it will be fun.

Happy Halloween

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World Building: It’s all in the details

Ask the Authors (Round 2)

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The world your story is is set in controls the possibilities for the characters and events in your story. This is more obvious in science fiction or fantasy perhaps, where magic or advanced technologies are the norm and are to be expected, but there is world building involved in others genres as well. every story has rules which may limit what can and can’t happen. And in every story, it is the author who creates the world and determines the rules, and it is the author’s job to clue readers in to what that world is like and what those rules are.

This may be easier with stories set in a reality that reflects the world we live in and are familiar with, because then readers may know most of the world, but it is still the author’s job to paint a picture with his or her words in order to allow reader’s a clear vision of their world. You would think in nonfiction this world we are familiar with, but it may be a setting we haven’t been to, or it might be from past times which are unfamiliar, so nonfiction authors must find ways to convey their story world clearly, too.

How exactly we, as authors, go about that may vary, but it is a task we are all faced with. Readers are allowed a glimpse into the story world through the details provided, including sensory details that make an unfamiliar world seem more real and help familiar worlds to ring more true. Dialog between characters is another tool that helps readers to buy in to the story and emerse themselves in the story world, but it’s one that may be difficult to get right.

Today, our Ask the Authors panel members will be discussing how they build and portray their story worlds, real or imagined. Our panel members this week include DeAnna Knippling, Lilly Rayman, Mark Shaw, Ashley Fontainne, RA Winter, Jordan Elizabeth, Tom Johnson, Cynthia Vespia and Amy Cecil. Let’s find out what works for them and what doesn’t.

Do you prefer to set your stories in the real world or one which you’ve created?

DeAnna Knippling
deannak I am generally terrible at creating entirely separate worlds, although I’ve had some really helpful tips lately, and I have a book planned pending more research into 18th-century Russia.  I’m much better at taking the real world, adding some odd element, and extrapolating from there.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman My main series – The Unexpected Trilogy is set in the real world, yet with paranormal characters. Yet I have a work in progress that is set in a world that I have created.

Ashley Fontainne

Ashley Fontainne Real world. Sometimes that requires an extensive amount of research yet using realistic settings gives the story a relatable connection to the readers.

RA Winter

RA Winter I love to write magical realism.  Taking the real world and bringing in those little details that take your breath away just gives me the chills as I write.  In my older series, I  brought in a realm we can’t see or touch but know are there.  The spirits who surround my MC’s with love or nefarious tendencies were fun to write. In my new series, I take the reader to the underworld and Olympus to meet the Greek gods.  I’ve read Dante’s Inferno, the Illiad, the Odyssey and I’ve read some Plato. They don’t all agree on the details so I rework characters for my own purpose.  You just have to stay consistent with your details.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I prefer worlds I’ve created.  There is more freedom to allow the story to take you where it will.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture One that I have created, but I want my world based on reality to some degree. Okay, SF really has no holds barred when we use telepathy, teleportation, time travel, and FTL because those have not been accomplished yet, and probably never will. But if I set my story in the 25th century I’m not going to have cell phones and iPads, either. Our technology will be far past those devices by then, and I get riled when I read a futuristic novel set a million years in the future and the main character pulls out a cell phone or iPad! Please, try to come up with something fresh.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy The real world is easier to write about, especially if I’ve actually been to the location. But creating worlds is half the fun. So I like to do both. Real world with fictional locations. For instance, in my novel Lucky Sevens it takes place in Las Vegas where I really grew up but the majority of the story is set within the fictional hotel/casino Saints & Sinners which I created specifically for the book.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil I use a little of both.  I take real places, real locations and set my story there, adding to them to fit into the story.


In fiction, even this world we live in becomes a physical backdrop for your story. Whether created from this reality or from your author’s mind, we must still help readers to visualize our story world.
How do you paint a picture for the reader so they can visualize your character’s physical environment?
DeAnna Knippling
 A lot of opinionated sense detail from my POV characters. They don’t just see a library full of books, they’re like, “Shame about the old Victorian haunted house’s library, with its thousands of stinking, mold-spotted, water-logged, mouse-eaten tomes.”
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I drop small elements of the physical backdrop into the prose of my story, it’s another element of avoiding information overload or boring word filling. When the backdrop becomes a part of the story in a descriptive sense, it helps you avoid boring the reader, allowing them to paint the picture in their mind’s eye as to the backdrop. Here’s an example from one of my current works in progress – this is the opening sentences of the story “Miracle In The Dust” and Australian setting:

The track stretched out before them, disappearing into the horizon like a red thread cutting through the scrub that undulated either side of the dirt road. Travis sighed at the bull-dust cloud that bloomed behind their horse truck in the side-mirror. It had been a dry winter, and it was shaping up to be a long hot dry summer.

Hopefully the reader can see what I can see, an arid landscape of red dust across the Australian outback with scrubby bushes that dot the rolling plains of a large stretch of land, and a bumpy dirt road.

Ashley Fontainne

Ashley Fontainne One of my favorite techniques is to just close my eyes and let my imagination immerse me inside the story, taking in all the smells, sounds, visuals and emotional responses of the characters in a particular scene.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I like to drop in descriptions here and there.  I try not to overwhelm the reader with thick paragraphs.  I’ve found it flows more smoothly if I add tidbits as the story progresses

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Hopefully, we will always have forests, oceans, and mountains. We can just give them different names and locations. The same for cities. Maybe moving sidewalks, dining tables in restaurants that float above the floor. Music that enchants instead of rocks. There is so much the author can do to build his world.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy That’s part of being a good writer. Its your job to take the image you see in your mind and paint it on the page with your verbiage so that the reader sees the same picture. It’s like coloring a picture. I used to really like to do the central image in the coloring books when I was little and I often left the background unfinished. But when I took the time to color in the rest of the picture it made it pop so much better. It was alot more visual.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil With using a real location to start with, I have real locations that I can work with to make my descriptions.  For example, in one of my books, it’s set in a town in Pennsylvania called Edinboro.  This town has a small resort community around a lake.  The house are not relatively large, but my main character has a mansion on this lake.  I found pictures on the internet of the house I was looking for and described the house from those pictures.


When creating fictional worlds, anything is possible, but only if you, the author make it so. The author controls what is and isn’t possible in their fictional world, and it is our job to clue the readers into these things.
How do you portray the rules of the world, beliefs and preferences of characters?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak Ah! The rules!  A lot of writers give me the “are you insane?” look when I tell them that they have to set out the story’s rules at the beginning of a story.  I’ve done this multiple ways, including literally writing out the rules.  A good, practical, low-key way to set out the rules is to tell the reader the POV character’s goals and expectations, noting the rules as things to be wary of as they attempt to achieve their goals.  “I knew I had to overcome the wizard, but the way my magic didn’t work from sunset to dawn was going to be a problem.”  Another way is to tuck the rules into the description of the setting.  “The gas lamps flickered and the heavy fog erased everything more than a hundred feet away.  Mocking voices called out, ‘Two shillings for a love-potion, only lasts until dawn! Two more shillings for a girl to stare at while you drink it!'”  There’s your magic system, embedded right into the world as part of the setting.
Understanding the world helps readers to buy into the story, allowing them to suspend disbelief and immerse themselves in the story. The events in the story don’t have to be possible in real life, but they do have to be possible in the world of the story in order to be believable. Have you ever had a reader catch an inconsistency in your story because a character did something that violated the rules of the world which you created?
My errors tend to be of a different nature!  I almost always forget that readers bring assumptions to stories, especially ones based on Earthly settings, and that if I’m not going to use that assumption, I’m going to have to stress that I’m not using it.  I had an orphan chimneysweep in a Victorian story who was a teenager, and a reader was upset that they weren’t, like, six.  Because Victorian orphan chimneysweeps should be six.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman In my only experience of world building I actually have an overlapping of the real world with my new world, via magic allowing for the main character to hop through the realms. The information that a reader needs about what my world and how it operates is provided in conversation when the main character first learns about the extra realm, and then when she finds herself in the new realm and has a conversation with a resident of the new realm who explains in conversation about the realm. Of course, this dialogue is broken up with some action and movement between the characters so that it doesn’t become an overload of static dialogue.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan Again, I add in little bits.  The hardest thing can be keeping true to your rules and not bending them as the story continues.  I keep a notebook next to me of rules and beliefs to make sure I stick to them throughout.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Usually this has something to do with the plot. A world of telepaths, and the necessary laws that might govern invading someone else’s mind. Or a world where one race has this ability and another doesn’t. This could cause conflicts between races.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I set those rules in my initial outline of the story and then I may or may not follow them depending on the direction the story is going in. I’m a big believer in breaking rules but not without a good reason.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil I normally go with what’s acceptable in that time period.  I write historical and contemporary, so I usually don’t veer away from the beliefs and preferences of that time.


Understanding the world helps readers to buy into the story, allowing them to suspend disbelief and immerse themselves in the story. The events in the story don’t have to be possible in real life, but they do have to be possible in the world of the story in order to be believable.

Have you ever had a reader catch an inconsistency in your story because a character did something that violated the rules of the world which you created?

Lilly Rayman

L Rayman No, I haven’t had anyone complain about anything that has happened in any of my stories. So far, all my published stories are built in this world with the supernatural being an element of the story, but I always try not to get too crazy with what my characters can or cannot do, to provide that element of “this could really happen!”

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan It has happened once or twice.  I’ve wanted to hug the reader.  “Thank you for catching that!  I’m going to make a note for the next release.  Also – why aren’t you my critique partner?!”

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture In my novel, Three Go Back, the mode of transportation is teleportation machines. Fossil fuel vehicles have long been replaced by these machines, and there is no longer need for fossil fuel. However, one of my characters is an old man, a professor of astronomy, who maintains a small jet. I left myself open with this, but no one seemed to question it. If fossil fuels are no longer needed, how does the professor keep fuel for his jet? I would have questioned it in someone else’s novel (LOL).

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy No, I’m very good at keeping my characters in check. I’ve had readers point out some elements that didn’t fit in some of my earlier work. For instance, I wrote about stainless steel in a historical and they noted it would not have been invented yet in the time period I was writing about. We all make mistakes. I’ve read alot of very well known authors who don’t remain consistent to the story or their characters and it becomes a let down. I try my best not to do that because it can ruin the story.


Some authors draw maps of the fictional worlds they create to help readers follow the events of the story.
Have you ever used this technique? What other techniques have you used to help readers visualize your world?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak Ech, as I’ve said, I’m terrible at creating other worlds, so I don’t usually need to draw maps–although I do tend to use a lot of map research, so I can keep things clear for myself.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I haven’t drawn any maps since I played at writing when I was 14 years old, and that was more for my own use to remember where my world was based. In my writing now, as a published author, I try to use descriptive prose to help the reader to visualise backdrop, whether it be here on earth or in a world of my own creation.

Ashley Fontainne
Ashley Fontainne I have not, yet think it is a magnificent idea!
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan I did have official maps for my original stories, but the publisher chose not to use them.  Now I just use a notebook and sketch a layout.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture I’ve never drawn a map of my worlds, but they would have probably helped in many cases. Usually the setting is a jungle or desert, and the characters must avoid a volcano or keep from getting lost in a desert. But would a map really help. Perhaps they can merely guide themselves by reading the stars and travelling north or south, east or west. However, when authors include a map, I do refer to it when following the adventure.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I drew a map once for a fantasy I was working on but I never actually used it. I use description to set the table of the scene and trust that my readers can visualize it from the cues I am giving them.


One of the questions in part 1 had to do with creating setting for places we’ve never been, which of course, encompasses all science fiction or fantasy worlds, as well as most speculative fiction worlds. Some panel members said they do a lot of online research of real settings they’ve never been to, but how many of you have explored real places which are similar to your fictional world, experiencing the sensory details in order to write them down?
Anyone explore physical locations in the flesh in order to get the details right when writing about a real location?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak When I can do this, I love it, but I can’t often afford to do so.  I’ll sometimes write stories set somewhere I’ve gone or planned to go, just because I can get deeper into the location.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman My Australiana setting is based off personal experience. My husband and I have travelled through Outback Queensland, and I intimately know the smell of the dry earth, or the smell of burning sap of a Eucalyptus gum tree in the scorching temperatures of Australia. And there is nothing more beautiful than the smell of rain hitting the dirt after an extended long period of dry. Having that sensory understanding helps an author to provide a detailed description that can pull the reader into the story for themselves. For other stories where the setting isn’t a location I have experienced, I scroll through the internet, researching the flora and fauna, going through images to get an idea of where my story is set.

Ashley Fontainne
Ashley Fontainne Once. When researching the real life mystery of the disappearance of famed Arkansas attorney Maude Crawford for Blood Loss, I went to her home in Camden, Arkansas, along with my mother (and co-author). The current owners of the home graciously allowed us to tour the residence and even take pictures. It was an amazing experience and allowed us to convey minute, specific details in the story we otherwise would have to invent.
RA Winter
RA Winter For locations, I use google maps while on the treadmill.  It’s a wonderful resource, as if the internet.  I’ve lived in five different countries, visited many others and have lived all over the US.  If I’m writing about someplace I’ve never been, I’ll ask people who’ve been there to read over my work before I publish it.  In one series, I wrote about a fictional city in Kansas.  It was a farm, which I grew up on one of those, so it was easy putting it in another state that I thought was beautiful driving through.
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan Unfortunately, no, but I love to travel.  I haven’t done much traveling since my son was born.  I’m hoping to start back up in a few years.  I love to write about places I’ve been to.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture I’ve been all over the world so can usually describe the places I’ve been in good detail – at least during the period I was there. And I can tell when an author has never been where s/he is writing about. Encyclopedias and postcards give you the colorful aspects of a foreign locale, but if you don’t know the culture or customs you’ll get it all wrong. During the pulp era authors usually wrote about areas they had travelled – China, Japan, Europe, etc. But the men’s adventure writers of the 1970s and later seldom left their home town, and were writing about Africa, Turkey, and Cairo, as well as other foreign lands with no real knowledge of the places, and most of it was terrible. But publishers were publishing, and readers were eating it up. How many western writers have actually rode a horse? Or could saddle a horse if necessary? Writing about a location is the same thing, you need to know what you’re writing about. Someone once said that if you read about a mesa in Louis L’Amour’s novel, you can go there and find it.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I don’t have the liberty to go traveling about like some of the big name authors do. But if I could I would because it lends more realism to the story if you know the secrets of a place because you’ve actually been there, not just from reading about it or seeing pictures and video. For instance I remember every bit of trips to Hawaii and Italy so I may set some future novels in these locales.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil Yes, absolutely.  I would have to say that the majority of my books are set in locations that I have been to.


Do you plan out your world or build as you go and see what happens?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak See what happens, with a stack of books and maps at my side!
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I generally find that my world builds for me as I write.

Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan I have a general idea, but I build as I go. The story takes me where it takes me.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture I build as I go

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I write as I go. Particularly when I’m writing an adventure fantasy piece I just move the story along to where it needs to go and then clean it up later in editing. The only time I really kept track of locations in my world was writing the sequels to Demon Hunter titled Demon Huntress. Because I was revisiting this world I already created I wanted to have my characters revisit places that I had written about in great detail during the original trilogy. That meant going back in to my previous work and finding out all I needed to know about these places.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil Build as I go, with the actual place as a start.


What tools or methods do you use to keep track of all the details of your world?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak I have a details sheet with names, dates, and locations.  I keep it pretty simple.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I read back through what I need to. I’m terrible at keeping notes, I lose anything I do make, so it’s easier to simply read back if I need to confirm a minor detail.

RA Winter

RA Winter I keep a series bible.  Every character’s physical, mental, plot bits, etc are kept tucked safely inside.  I also use it for descriptions and will keep house plans, pictures of objects, models and the descriptions I’ve used.  It’s essential in any story for keeping your facts straight.
Jordan Elizabeth
Jordan I have a notebook full of information.  I used to create a PowerPoint for each story because I am obsessed with using PowerPoint.  That meant a lot of slides to click through.  A notebook is easier…but less fun.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Notes are very important.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy I don’t do anything special to keep track. If I need to know what I said about a place before I just go back into the novel and reread what I wrote already.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil All those are kept in my story boards, where I outline the story by chapter.  Locations are put in there so that everything stays consistent.


Sensory Details

How do you pick the right sensory details for your story?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak I slip into character.  Almost every character can see things, but different people have different experiences of how their senses interact with the world.  I have a musician character who hears things more than I do.  I have a character with synaethesia who tastes colors and auras.  Some characters are texture characters, they feel things with their hands.  Others do a lot of smell.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I just want to say before I start answering, that I found these sensory questions the hardest to answer. For me, this sort of detail comes instinctively to me, and to answer these questions I had to think very hard about what I actually do in my writing to provide the answers to these questions.

I always ask myself what the main aim of the story is. The whole feel I want from the story influences which sensory details that I would concentrate on. Referencing back to my Australiana story Miracle In The Dust, the weather in itself is a main driving force behind some of the story. The sensory details I concentrate on is not only the weather itself, but the effects of the weather on the landscape. There needs to be a sense of desperation to the beginning of the story that allows for the miracle that I have planned to shine through.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I think about somewhere I’ve been in real life that is similar.  What did I smell?  Could I taste the air?  What did I feel?

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Knowledge helps. Imaginations also helps. Knowing which way water flows from the Great Lakes if your story is set in that area. What is the best fish to eat in Canada. Hint, they don’t eat mud cat.


What kind of sight details might be important in a story?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak Ones that are almost painfully specific, rather than generalized.  You can’t write every visual detail, but the ones you pick should lean toward the specific.  A shirt isn’t “red,” it’s “fire-engine red.”  A tree isn’t a “tree,” it’s a “contentedly conical Douglas fir.”
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Again, anything that helps to emphasis the main goal of the story, details that help building the right tension or feeling that will only improve the story and help to immerse the reader into the story. Moving back to my earlier answer where I shared with you the opening lines of Miracle In The Dust, and I referenced the cloud of bull-dust that billowed behind the truck. It’s a visual element that anyone who lives in outback or regional Australia takes for granted as being an every day element of life, yet it’s an integral visual element that helps me create depth into my story.


What methods do you use to add sound details to your stories?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak I have the sound occur and make sure characters react to it.  That whole thing where you read, “Susan heard the sound of a pin drop” is for the birds.  “A pin dropped on the wood floor, bouncing several times.  Susan flinched, pulling up her feet” is much better.  Likewise any other sense.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Descriptive words. Adding the sound in as a tension builder or a climax to a scene, for example when there is a gun shot is it a short sharp crack in a bar, or a long drawn out echo across the land. Here is an example of how I used sound within my writing in An Unexpected Bonding:

Rance watched in disbelief as the young man turned and watched the approach of the wolf. He must be stunned to stand there as the wolf launched in the air.

He squeezed his finger.

CRACK-K-K-k-k-k-k-k.

The shot resounded across the land.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I try not to write out the sounds.  That seems too much like a comic book to me.  (I love comic books, by the way, but its not the feel I want for my novels.)

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Let me show you instead: From Pangaea: Eden’s Planet:

The outer wave struck the giant ship with incredible force.
Suddenly, they could see nothing but ebony blackness in the view screen, and then the ship began to shake and vibrate violently as waves of immense energy tossed the Galileo Two from side to side like a small boat in a hurricane. The controls fought them, and the machinery whined like a screaming Banshee on a dark, moonless night. Warning lights flickered, dimmed, went out, came back on with a flash, and then repeated the sequence like a floundering fish out of water.

Someone screamed, but it was impossible to tell whether it had been a man or a woman. The safety harnesses held everyone safely in their seats, but a few loose objects had been lying near some of the computers, and these went flying through the small cabin, colliding with seats, computer panels, and sometimes—an unprotected hand or head.

Lightning bolts of pure energy sparked and crisscrossed the tornado-like funnel in a spider-web of violent beauty, at the far end appeared to be a gaping monster’s mouth. But the plasma would not let them go, tossing them around like the prey of some monstrous space creature.


In what ways have you incorporated touch details into your writing?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak At first I had characters look at textures and note them, or touch things, but lately I’ve been adding elements that the character really has a reaction to, like the feeling that it’s cold and one’s sweater isn’t warm enough, or the touch of a spiderwebs that you’ve brushed off but can’t stop checking to make sure.  Someone who has to clean a milkshake off a barnwood door is going to have a distinct opinion about the texture!
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman As a romance writer touch is such an important factor in creating a sensory moment for the readers to feel as if they are as intimately a part of the scene themselves.
Touch isn’t just about a intimate moment, but something as simple as providing more descriptive imagery for a wolf, such as when a character sinks their fingers into the soft thickness of the wolf’s neck.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I enjoy describing the ground or clothes.  Usually I’m describing the ground because the character just fell!  I tend to abuse my characters.


How do you factor in taste and smell details?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak My characters are always eating something, for one, maybe because I’m often at the computer writing and wondering when it’s time for lunch. Sometimes I have to have them smell things with a strong taste associated with them, like “chocolate chip cookies.”  Smell is easier.  I always wonder how people can write without it; people have such emotional reactions to smell that smell is almost a writer shortcut that you can abuse at will.  You don’t even have to be specific with smell details.  All you have to do is say, “the smell of sewage” and people the world over will be like, “Got it.”
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman Where ever it has an impact on the depth of the story, such as during a meal, providing a description that is “mouth-watering” and makes the reader want to actually be eating that meal as well. Of course, taste and smell doesn’t have to be pleasant. If you think about a thriller or a murder mystery story, discovering a crime scene can be filled with smells that are so offensive they end up having a taste element as well.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I write about smell a lot, but taste not so much.  I’m going to make a note here to work on that.

I love adding in scents.  You don’t get a lot of that in stories.  Even if the reader can’t actually smell it (because its a paper book or e-reader), they can remember what a flower smells like…or a field after a rain storm.


Many of your readers have been to or even lived in locations where your stories are set, so they are able to relate when you get the details right, but if you get something wrong, it’s almost guaranteed that somebody will catch it and let you know about it.
Have you ever had a reader tell you that you missed the mark with a certain detail?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak Not yet!  Fingers crossed.
Lilly Rayman
L Rayman Nope, I haven’t. I’ve been fairly lucky that I have been able to create stories the evoke memories of being there for readers that do have experience of my locations.

Ashley Fontainne

Ashley Fontainne One reviewer mentioned no one from California would ever refer to the state as “Cali” as one of the characters in Blood Ties did, which I found humorous. I grew up in Orange County, as did my mother, and we still have relatives there who use the expression. Another reviewer gave low marks for Whispered Pain because the story takes place in Arkansas, in the winter, during a freak snow storm. The person actually wrote they “researched weather patterns” online and it “never snows in Arkansas” which still makes me laugh. I have lived in Arkansas for over thirty years and experienced many snow and ice storms. I am sure the folks working for insurance companies processing thousands upon thousands of storm damage claims would agree with me!

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan Yes!  They usually do it nicely, but I have had some people rip me to shreds over the setting of COGLING.  The setting is a fantasy kingdom.  The main character is living in a dusty, dirty city, and she must travel through the woods into the swamp to save her brother.  I’ve had people send me the rudest emails about how I missed the mark on describing London or England in general.  Um, it isn’t London or England.  I’m not sure why I get so much hate mail about that because I clearly state the names of the city and country in the text.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture No, but I do it all the time, so get it right and you won’t hear from me.


Effective Dialog

Dialog tags can be helpful in identifying who is speaking in the story. Good dialog tags should be almost invisible, so the reader brushes right over them, but still knows who is talking.
Do you prefer to use dialog tags, or do you find them a hindrance? If you don’t use dialog tags, how do you let the reader know who the speaker is?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak I use dialog tags.  I’ll use a more distinct dialog tag when I want to bring the reader’s attention to something–usually when the character is lying or there some other subtext but that’s really rare; I’ll usually handle it in the dialog itself.  Generally I stick with the “he said” pattern.  I would like to note that putting a dialog tag at the end of a sentence if the reader will really not be clear on who is speaking is lame.  Put it at the beginning.  The reader should have zero words of going, “But who is talking?!?” in a normal scene.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture If your characterization is good, you don’t need a lot of dialog tags. But when you have four or five people speaking, you’d best use tags.

Cynthia Vespia

colorheadshot - Copy That’s tricky. I hate alot of “he said” and “she said” type of stuff. Writing dialogue is one of my strongest attributes as a writer so I just let it flow naturally using tags if I find I need to.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil I use too many dialog tags and have diligently working to replace them with an action.


Do you feel that dialog tags beyond the basic ones like ‘said’ and ‘asked’ can be distracting and draw away from the story?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak “Which is sometimes exactly what you want,” the dowager countess snapped.  “Some stories ought to be drawn away from, they are so terribly written.”
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I tried to avoid the basic he said / she said dialogue tags. I do like to use some sort of description to identify the speaker, even if it is as simple as an action that someone does as they speak. It makes for a scene that moves along without being static and identifies the speaker.

RA Winter

RA Winter Action tags work well and serve a dual purpose of bringing the action closer to the reader.  A write just has to be careful that the action tag dedicated to the person speaking.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I use some dialogue tags.  I like to describe what’s going on instead.  Its a great opportunity to add in a smell or texture, or something the speaker is seeing.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture I’ve only known a few authors who are good with dialog. The rest of us struggle with it, and I don’t think tags that go beyond “said” and “asked” are all that distracting.

Amy Cecil

Amy Cecil I do. That is why I try to avoid them.


Dialog should be believable, in that it is realistic of something that not only a real person might say, but something that your character would say. I’ve found though, that if you use a piece of dialog that occurred in real life, many feel it is not realistic.
How do you write believable dialog which reads smoothly?
DeAnna Knippling
deannak The same way you write an accent:  accurately like 20% of the time, suggestive of accuracy rather than actually, um, like, accurate.  But I’d like to note that the process of learning to write believable dialog generally starts with sitting down at a coffee shop and writing down what people actually say.  Writers tend to start out with a problem of forcing characters to say useful things in a direct fashion that sounds stilted.  In real life, people talk around what they want and feel and replace it with small talk.  High fantasy writers and hard sci-fi writers are the worst!  I’ve judged some contests, and I’m always coming across writers who have Big Things to Say and who can’t handle the polite nothings that are required in order to get to the point of communicating.  I want to see a high fantasy novel where the heroes talk to the villagers about the weather and they come away knowing that that Evil Sorcerer has been there because the wheat looks scraggly from all the damp.  Or a sci-fi epic where people are like, “So how about them Bears?”  Of course in the future people will still follow professional sports, duh.
Lilly Rayman

L Rayman I try to write dialogue as I would speak, and ensure that all speech is contracted, meaning people doing in real life don’t say “do not” they say “don’t”. I also try and write appropriate slang into my dialogue for the characters background.

Ashley Fontainne

Ashley Fontainne As I mentioned before, when I am in full writing mode, I try to close my eyes and watch the story unfold as though viewing a movie. From there, I write what I see, which includes the dialog between the characters.

RA Winter

RA Winter Cut anything that isn’t necessary, it slows down the reader.  Don’t do the phone conversation of “Hello?”  “Hi, is so-and-so there?”  “Who’s calling please?”  “Oh, it’s Mr. Jones.”  Why?  Don’t.  It’s boring.

Jordan Elizabeth

Jordan I repeat it out loud to myself.  If it sounds good, I leave it.

Tom Johnson

Tom's Back Cover Picture Again, I’ve only known a few writers that could write good dialog, Warren Murphy and Dan Cushman. The rest o us struggle.

Cynthia Vespia
colorheadshot - Copy I disagree. As a writer I spend alot of time listening to people talk and I pick up subtle nuances that stick with me so when I go to write I deliver a more realistic aspect to a character because of those bits and pieces. When it gets forced is when you start trying to write in accents. I say just mention that someone has a specific accent and write the dialogue as you would for anyone else. Alot of choppy words will just get confusing. I know it worked in alot of classic novels but hey…I’m not in that caliber yet!
Amy Cecil
Amy Cecil I act out the dialog as I’m writing it.

Nonfiction
You write about real people and places. How do you assure that the cultural and physical settings are true to the story? 
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) Don’t mess with that much. More interested in primary source information about my main subject and those who make the story compelling.
Do you ever actually visit the places you write about?
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) Yes, for both The Reporter Who Knew Too Much and the upcoming Denial of Justice, I visited New York City. Actually went to locations where Dorothy Kilgallen frequented including my sitting next to the table at P. J. Clarke’s where she sat on the last night of her life.
Much of the writing you do is about people and places of the past.
When writing about historical places, how do you find and work in the details to make it authentic?
Mark Shaw
MarkAtSFTS (1) Use only primary sources but again, the subject is the story, not so much the historical places.
As you can see, there are many approaches to drawing readers into our worlds, whether real or imagined. At times the approach may depend on what genre we are writing in. Certainly, my approach to creating and portraying Delilah, which is a western and required historical research for accuracy and visiting certain locations to get the details right, is quite different from my approach in portraying my science fantasy world for my Playground for the Gods series, which explored myths and legends of old using landscapes mostly created in my head. But even when writing about real places, such as in nonfiction, the author must find ways to draw readers into the story, and add those special touches which bring the setting to life is one way to do that. This information can be conveyed by using dialog between characters to help readers learn what we need them to know, or through sensory details that make the setting seem more real.
I want to thank our author panel members for sharing their ideas and techniques with us. I hope you’ll pick and choose the ideas that work for you. And I hope you’ll join us next Monday, when our author panel will discuss writing action scenes and pacing.

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“Lost Girl”: A paranormal thriller mystery just in time for Halloween

Lost Girl

 

Lost Girl, by Anne Francis Scott keeps the suspense ratched up to high, with more twists and turns that a serpentine spiral. This paranormal suspense mystery is crafted with skill that keeps readers guessing, but in a good way. Her search for her past draws Alison to Dawson Mills, where some very strange things occur. She is haunted by a past that she can’t quite remember, one just as disturbing as the ghost children she sees in the woods around the large Victorian she intends to make her home. But, does the danger lie in the ghost children, or is there a greater menace lurking in the shadows?

Ghosts, suspense and questions galore, Lost Girl has all the elements of a good scary story. I give it five quills.

Five Quills3

 

Kaye Lynne Booth does honest book reviews on Writing to be Read in exchange for ARCs. Have a book you’d like reviewed? Contact Kaye at kayebooth(at)yahoo(dot)com.